I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
