i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
