I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
