sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
