Duck Duck Cougar?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
MIDGETS
????
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
