There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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