making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize