You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
