Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
