Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
In other news, I just burned my penis
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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