He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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