Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Dick very happy bro
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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