The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
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I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
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I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
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