When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
honey bunches of taint.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
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