HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize