Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
people are starting to question the shark bite story
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
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