The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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