i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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