there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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