So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
