Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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