i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize