Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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