gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
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