'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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