Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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