Kiss
Puke
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
