we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
