Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
