He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
