He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize