I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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