If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Randomize
