He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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