My brain says no but my pants say off.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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