Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
vagina is talking i cant
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
