I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
