I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I checked into jail on foursquare
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
they're like a gay fantastic four
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Randomize
