he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
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not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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