Say something about gay babies.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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