i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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