how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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