WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize
