wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
