who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Oh god it's open bar.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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