So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize