He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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