Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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