she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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