is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize